Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize