I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
