the new term for farting is butt boxing.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Mom said you looked used
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
