well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
