she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
