Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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