He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize