Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
