sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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