I hate your face
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
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