Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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