Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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