No awkward lesbian experiences without me
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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