Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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