I feel great
I just peed on a car
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
