Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize