So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
