Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
