Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
