and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize