Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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