You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
