Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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