I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize