I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize