youre lurking in front of me
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He did a backflip because drugs
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
