u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
