But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize