And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
