Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
