He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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