hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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