why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
