i think i have herpe
just one?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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