we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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