tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
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