3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
