Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
