I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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