So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
