I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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