Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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