so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
