her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
