I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
