There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
