the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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