party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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