can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.