Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Randomize